Last post wins!!!!!

[perfect_pitch]

I love movies with a happy ending.

[j_tour]

I love movies with a happy ending.

Sure!  We all do.  Just don't happy ending on Meg Tilly's photograph:  that's my gal, and I got to do some happy ending yet again before I go to sleep!

You can have it later, though.  After I've completed my tasks.

[perfect_pitch]

Sure!  We all do.  Just don't happy ending on Meg Tilly's photograph

Of course, I wouldn't. That's what socks and Kleenex are for.   

[j_tour]

Of course, I wouldn't. That's what socks and Kleenex are for.   

Wow.

I think you just broke all kinds of records for .... I don't even know what.

Socks?  Really?

Jeez. 

At least I've got my mother's smelly a** to come home to!  Big, plump, and oily.  And if she's not there, I got a sister not far away!

Bit of a commute, but I make the effort when required.

You are a twisted dude! 

[perfect_pitch]

Wow.

I think you just broke all kinds of records for .... I don't even know what.

Socks?  Really?

Jeez. 

At least I've got my mother's smelly a** to come home to!  Big, plump, and oily.  And if she's not there, I got a sister not far away!

Bit of a commute, but I make the effort when required.

You are a twisted dude!

Seriously... socks are just evil, but incest is perfectly fine???

[j_tour]

Seriously... socks are just evil, but incest is perfectly fine???

Meh, it goes back to ancient times. 

In the dark, it all is about the same.

Well, that's what they kept telling me in prison, anyway.

[perfect_pitch]

Well, that's what they kept telling me in prison, anyway.

Another fragment of J_Tour's troubled past.

You ever thought of going back? I mean, you get 3 square meals, you seem to make a lot of friends, and you wouldn't need to be eating mice just to survive.

[j_tour]

I mean, you get 3 square meals, you seem to make a lot of friends, and you wouldn't need to be eating mice just to survive.

Don't you rile me, sugar!

[lelle]

You need to take better care of your cars, j_tour 

[j_tour]

You need to take better care of your cars, j_tour 

It's just a scratch.  It will buff out fine, no problem.

[perfect_pitch]

I hate to say this J_Tour... but

COURIER FONT SUCKS ARSE!!!

[j_tour]

COURIER FONT SUCKS ARSE!!!

So, you're some kind of connoisseur on the taste of arse?

OK!  Everyone needs hobbies, I guess.

You'd be a popular fellow in prison!  Tossing salads right and left!

[perfect_pitch]

So, you're some kind of connoisseur on the taste of arse?

No... not necessarily. I mean, I'm no Psychologist but I know flat-earthers & people who believe in aliens are *** NUTS!!!

I'm not an acting coach, but I know that Paris Hilton can't act for sh*t.

[j_tour]

I'm not an acting coach, but I know that Paris Hilton can't act for sh*t.

Silence, fool!  I am having a rather good Roquefort cheese for dinner. 

Paris Hilton, if her disgusting corpse has not putrefied yet, probably could yield a good head cheese.

Boil it, until mushy, knead the fats and other tissues it a bit in fresh air, then press it into a loaf.  Slice thinly and enjoy on a stout rye bread.

On second, though, a better looking, healthier cow or pig would yield better results.

[perfect_pitch]

Silence, fool!  I am having a rather good Roquefort cheese for dinner. 

Paris Hilton, if her disgusting corpse has not putrefied yet, probably could yield a good head cheese.

Boil it, until mushy, knead the fats and other tissues it a bit in fresh air, then press it into a loaf.  Slice thinly and enjoy on a stout rye bread.

On second, though, a better looking, healthier cow or pig would yield better results.

You have to give him points for creativity. That is... highly creepy.

[lostinidlewonder]

Cheese is exciting.

[perfect_pitch]

Cheese is exciting.

No it's not. I mean, why would ANYONE roll down a hill, possibly breaking limbs and bones for a roll of Cheese, when you can get it from any deli for $20.

It's like the HARDEST, MOST PAINFUL, LEAST SATISFYING AND MOST DANGEROUS way to get cheese.

[lostinidlewonder]

It's like the HARDEST, MOST PAINFUL, LEAST SATISFYING AND MOST DANGEROUS way to get cheese.

You must enjoy Casu marzu, I'd rather break my legs.

[perfect_pitch]

What the *** is WRONG with people??? That is DISGUSTING!!!

Basically... that's not cheese - it's MAGGOT sh*t!!!

[j_tour]

It's like the HARDEST, MOST PAINFUL, LEAST SATISFYING AND MOST DANGEROUS way to get cheese.

You mean, aside from using cat or rodent milk?

Basically... that's not cheese - it's MAGGOT sh*t!!!

Well, I enjoy a warm, ripe Roquefort, as I have several times last week.  It's not that far off.  Anyway, nobody really eats Casu Marzu.  It's a novelty item, more or less.

[perfect_pitch]

You mean, aside from using cat or rodent milk?

Who eats cats milk or rats milk??? That is disgusting.

[j_tour]

Who eats cats milk or rats milk??? That is disgusting.

No u.

[perfect_pitch]

And i thought Haggis was bad.

[Bob]

[perfect_pitch]

That's not that different from that lovely video I posted of idiotic skateboarders having various MODERATELY painful and brutal injuries.

[lostinidlewonder]

India has the scariest rides.

[j_tour]

India has the scariest rides.

Kitty?  Kitty has the scariest rides? 

I agree!

[lostinidlewonder]

India, not kitty.

[perfect_pitch]

Kitty?  Kitty has the scariest rides? 

Why not just edit the thread and hide your screw up...

Nah, I've quoted it anyway for posterity.

[j_tour]

Why not just edit the thread and hide your screw up...

Kitty?  Kitty?  Stop smothering the infant, kitty!

I know exactly what I was saying, fool.

I'm hard of hearing, what with the music and the grenade exploding in my helmet and all that.

[perfect_pitch]

You're obsessed with kittens...

(I was going to make a reference to another synonym for kitten, but figured I'd take the high road and not debase myself to such juvenile jokes)

[j_tour]

You're obsessed with kittens...

So?  I like some fur!  And tacos!  And pies!  Preferably in one convenient package.

Why are there so few kittens in the jungles?





















Paracetamol.

[Bob]

Aspirin?  Aspirin prevents kittens?

[j_tour]

Aspirin?  Aspirin prevents kittens?

No, but parrots eat 'em all, the kittens.

And wrong drug, anyway:  paracetamol is another name for acetaminophen, aka Tylenol.  I shan't trust you to mule my illicit contraband across the border!  You, sir, are no Hunter S. Thompson!  That probably accounts for your improbable longevity, so that's a good thing.

Believe it....or not!

[perfect_pitch]

Aspirin?  Aspirin prevents kittens?

Depends on how much you can force feed them. I think Aspirin would prevent a lot of things if you take a few mouthfuls.

[j_tour]

Depends on how much you can force feed them. I think Aspirin would prevent a lot of things if you take a few mouthfuls.

They love it!  The average kitten has been known to consume upwards of half its body weight of aspirin in a single meal session, given the opportunity.

[lostinidlewonder]

If you are suggesting feeding animals poison you should perhaps snort some cyanide although that death will be a lot more pleasant.

[j_tour]

If you are suggesting feeding animals poison you should perhaps snort some cyanide although that death will be a lot more pleasant.

I keep aspirin in child-proof containers.

However, kittens, with their prehensile tails and opposable thumbs somehow find their way into my supply.  And I don't even have a cat!

They're very clever beasts!

I think Aspirin would prevent a lot of things if you take a few mouthfuls.

It cures glaucoma, and is the one substance known to repair a deviated septum.  Facts!

[perfect_pitch]

If you are suggesting feeding animals poison you should perhaps snort some cyanide although that death will be a lot more pleasant.

I didn't say that... although this forum would be a lot more boring if we stuck to the rules and talked about... (uuuugh) Civilised matters.

[lostinidlewonder]

It's not even suave or clever to make fun of certain things. Actually finding joy talking about animal cruelty just shows a demented psyche akin to those who are are psychopaths. Your mothers should have slapped your bottoms more.

[j_tour]

My "mother" still slaps my bottom.  They took her away, though, to the bad place.

[perfect_pitch]

It's not even suave or clever to make fun of certain things. Actually finding joy talking about animal cruelty just shows a demented psyche akin to those who are are psychopaths. Your mothers should have slapped your bottoms more.

You do realise that no one takes a lot of what is said here to be serious... the world needs to lighten the *** up and stop being so litigious. I didn't say I take joy in animal cruelty, and never once claimed that. It was a statement made just to match the ludicrousness of what J_Tour said. I also suspect that this:

Isn't really his mother. Fun question though lost... Do you eat meat? Would you consider the fact that cows are put down just so we can have a big juicy hamburger, as animal cruelty???

[lostinidlewonder]

If cows were put to death in an agonising manner I would have something to say about it. The world doesn’t need to lighten up when it comes to jokes about torturing animals, should we make light of rape  and child molestation to? Lighten up about that? If you’ve ever witnessed an animal dying of poisoning you’ll know it’s nothing to do with lightening up about psychotic jokes.

[perfect_pitch]

FOR GOODNESS SAKE... it was hypothetical; it was just a fleeting thought. I didn't take it seriously and I didn't mean it to be actually serious so please don't put any actual gravitas into what I said.

The point of this thread is to be the last poster in order to win... I don't use this as some sort of confessional for all my dark thoughts.

Take a drink of wine and relax or something...

[lostinidlewonder]

FOR GOODNESS SAKE... it was hypothetical; it was just a fleeting thought.

Ah so fleeting thoughts you can have thoughts of molestation, rape, murder and make light of it all? Sounds ridiculous.

I didn't take it seriously and I didn't mean it to be actually serious so please don't put any actual gravitas into what I said.

Seriousness is not the issue its the fact that someone thinks its funny to joke about something that just isn't funny at all, they have the freedom to do that but then I have the freedom to call out the freaks that do stuff like that.

The point of this thread is to be the last poster in order to win... I don't use this as some sort of confessional for all my dark thoughts.

Take a drink of wine and relax or something...

Why are you so triggered by my reaction to someone talking about animal torture? I think it is you who needs to relax mate.

And yes this is my attempt at winning the thread, I will psychologically chastize you.

[perfect_pitch]

Ah so fleeting thoughts you can have thoughts of molestation, rape, murder and make light of it all?

I don't have any thoughts like that - who's the one being dramatic here???

Seriousness is not the issue its the fact that someone thinks its funny to joke about something that just isn't funny at all

Did I say AT ALL, that I thought this was funny??? NO!!! I never once declared that.

Why are you so triggered by my reaction to someone talking about animal torture? I think it is you who needs to relax mate.

You're the one who became triggered at a silly, off the cuff remark.

If you are suggesting feeding animals poison you should perhaps snort some cyanide although that death will be a lot more pleasant.

From your statement, it sound like you thought it pleasing to think about people committing suicide and your tone and statement seemed a lot more serious than what I put into my initial statement.

I think it is you who needs to relax mate.

I am perfectly relaxed - I've managed to keep a cool head in this thread for over 8 years and I'm not the one who got worked up over some text on a screen.

Please get a grip on reality.

[j_tour]

[lostinidlewonder]

I don't have any thoughts like that - who's the one being dramatic here???

Oh gosh. You said

"Did I say AT ALL, that I thought this was funny??? NO!!! I never once declared that. "

"it was hypothetical; it was just a fleeting thought."

Why do you even mention these things? They don't defend the fact that something tasteless is trying to be used in jest, it's just not funny or clever.

Who cares what you have to think about it, it was said in some kind of joking manner. My point still remains there are just some things which are not funny or clever and I gave you some examples.

You're the one who became triggered at a silly, off the cuff remark.

No you are! so there.

From your statement, it sound like you thought it pleasing to think about people committing suicide and your tone and statement seemed a lot more serious than what I put into my initial statement.

You just missed the logical meaning behind its connection. I said animal torture is not funny and you're like oh its said in jest, its this its that, stop being so senstive. gtfo lol. There are things which are just not funny and there's no point in trying to defend it you are in a totally losing position if you try.

I am perfectly relaxed - I've managed to keep a cool head in this thread for over 8 years and I'm not the one who got worked up over some text on a screen.

But you are, you are trying to censor me saying animal cruelty is not funny and i shouldn't be so sensitive. Well you are a tough big guy maybe it doesn't matter to you, but don't be so pig headed and think people are being overly sensitive if you don't like what they have to say.

Please get a grip on reality.

The reality is that you are crying over me from saying it's not funny making jokes about animal cruelty. But continue, you know I like to go on for pages and pages if need be, it sure will make winning this thread so much more difficult for anyone who wants to do this rubbish.

[perfect_pitch]

You're right - you're so 'NOT' triggered. Your post above says more than I ever could.



I'm still relaxed... how about you?

[j_tour]