Last post wins!!!!!

[Bob]

[perfect_pitch]

I bet you that little guy woke up one day and thought...

'Finally, I've managed to get this thing working properly. Time for my escape'.

[j_tour]

Didn't we already settle the batman thing?

But did you notice the study that batmen do not get the corona disease? So it can only whup your arse...

I had the COVID, you weak-kneed little ballerina!  I was in bed for a week with fever, dry cough, and general malaise.  It might have been a rhinovirus or another coronavirus, but I'm immune!  Well, maybe. 

I had some cool feverish hallucinations, though, so that was...sort of neat,..in a not really neat way.

I don't know any head of State's who are on YouTube?

Lady Elaine Fairchild?  I don't know.

Also, as a point of fact, p_p, I'm not too sure gerbils do a whole lot of thinking over the course of their lives. Otherwie why would they insist upon spending their time up my ass, and also like their older cousins, the guinea pigs, being so delicious? 

Yeah, riddle me that.

I am far from done with whupping batman's ass.

And now I have animal helpers.

[perfect_pitch]

Otherwie why would they insist upon spending their time up my ass

You and Richard Gere are pen-pals, aren't you? 

 

[outin]

And now I have animal herpes.

Fixed that typo...
Luckily I only have the usual one right now...

[perfect_pitch]

And now I have animal herpes.

I don't know what... to... I mean...



There are no words... none.

[j_tour]

You and Richard Gere are pen-pals, aren't you? 

 

Oh, we're well beyond that.

He helps me in everything I do.

[perfect_pitch]

Oh, we're well beyond that.

He helps me in everything I do.

And what that entails, I DON'T want to know.

[outin]

Oh, we're well beyond that.

He helps me in everything I do.

Like the weird guy? How many people do you see following you around exactly?

[perfect_pitch]

Like the weird guy? How many people do you see following you around exactly?

I'm sure there are many people following him around...

The FBI, CIA, Scientologists, men in long white lab coats, the Illuminati...

I could go on.

[Bob]

*Bob brings in an echidna to push people aside for an easy win.* 

[perfect_pitch]

Sorry, but if you want cute... that guy is ugly as sin.

This guy...



...wins.

[outin]

Pathetic. Mammals are so boring...



But if you insist...

[perfect_pitch]

You LITERALLY just wrote...

Mammals are so boring...

So why post a picture of them? Spiders are boring. They're ugly and revolting and they leave a mess everywhere with their bloody webs. And I swear, if I ever see another large spider sitting above the toilet bowl when I'm relieving my bowels...

I will burn the mother-*** house down and declare war against them. I already have a flame-thrower, ready to use.

[outin]

Spiders are boring. They're ugly and revolting and they leave a mess everywhere with their bloody webs.

I have to say I have never seen one IRL...

And I swear, if I ever see another large spider sitting above the toilet bowl when I'm relieving my bowels...

I will burn the mother-*** house down and declare war against them. I already have a flame-thrower, ready to use.

Boy, you really are estranged from nature...

[j_tour]

Oh you people.  Always talking about animals and mammals and Richard Gere and John Wayne and stuff.

Ridiculous.

[Bob]

Really it's because it's "something I didn't watch" and that was the first pic that came up.  The rest were Apple watches. 


edit:   Darnit...
https://secureimg.stitcher.com/feedimagesplain328/454693.jpg

[Bob]

Meanwhile...

https://www.instagram.com/tv/B_GHycPBPEn/

[perfect_pitch]

John Wayne

Who???

[j_tour]

Who???

How should I know?  On my best days I'm an idiot.

Here, have one on me.

[outin]

How should I know?  On my best days I'm an idiot.

Here, have one on me.

Why on earth would anyone want to watch a YT video of some blond guy talking about the music of TM when you could spend that few minutes of your life actually listening to Monk's playing???

[perfect_pitch]

Give me Mozart anyday of the week over Monk.

[j_tour]

Give me Mozart anyday of the week over Monk.

All right.  You and outin just made my list.

That's right you crazy fools.

And, yes, outin, it's supposed to be a joke, the video.  The organist and keyboard player Larry Goldings put on that verkakte wig and did those videos as a spoof.  IOW it's a joke, man.  He's a pretty good jazz organist.  Not one of my idols or anything, but he's OK as a player, and a pretty nice guy IIRC from when he was up at Augie's near Columbia on the upper West side, playing that old Korg CX-3.  I might be mistaken, but I make a lot of mistakes.

And, yes, if I could figure out a way to arrange the second aria of the queen of the night from Mozart, I'd probably prefer to play that too.

The only way I can think of that is to cover the harmony and rhythm on acoustic piano with LH, and liberal amounts of sost. pedal, and do the vocals in RH on the Hammond organ.

[perfect_pitch]

All right.  You and outin just made my list.

I'm already on Santa's 'naughty' list... I don't think I'll care being on yours either.

[outin]

Sorry, j_foul, I did not watch the video because 99% of YT videos where people talk about music are BS.

And I absolutely CANNOT STAND MOZART!

His music I mean...the guy probably wasn't that bad...I could have had a few beers with him.

[j_tour]

I'm already on Santa's 'naughty' list... I don't think I'll care being on yours either.

Well, it's too late!  I already made my list!  I never change my mind, ever!

Also, Père Noël is not real!  Nor the Easter Bunny or whatever.

[j_tour]

Sorry, j_foul, I did not watch the video because 99% of YT videos where people talk about music are BS.

And I absolutely CANNOT STAND MOZART!

His music I mean...the guy probably wasn't that bad...I could have had a few beers with him.

what? 

Who doesn't like Mozart?

OMFG.

I mean, yeah, he wasn't always the best, but really?

I'd never even heard of anybody who didn't enjoy listening to or playing at least some of Mozart.

All right, buddy.  Now you're on my new revised list!

[outin]

what? 

Who doesn't like Mozart?

OMFG.

I mean, yeah, he wasn't always the best, but really?

I'd never even heard of anybody who didn't enjoy listening to or playing at least some of Mozart.

All right, buddy.  Now you're on my new revised list!

Well, you have heard of me now, have you?
And I am serious. I just don't get how anyone would voluntarily listen to his music...Classisism is generally boring, but Mozart's is annoying as h*ll. In fact my h*ll would probably be filled with that stuff.
But then again, it seems there's something wrong with 99,9999999% of mankind...so I guess there's nothing to wonder really...

[j_tour]

Well, you have heard of me now, have you?
And I am serious. I just don't get how anyone would voluntarily listen to his music...Classisism is generally boring, but Mozart's is annoying as h*ll. In fact my h*ll would probably be filled with that stuff.
But then again, it seems there's something wrong with 99,9999999% of mankind...so I guess there's nothing to wonder really...

Well, de gustibus, to each his or her own.

For me, I love his mature opera and many of his piano concerti.  I could do without many of his piano sonatas, but to each his or her own. 

And you're probably right:  he would have been a fun guy to hoist a beer with in Wien.  I don't know very much about his personal life, though.

[outin]

But hey, this guy is also called Mozart. I like him

[perfect_pitch]

That is the reason we invented flame-throwers.

Imagine one of them sitting above you when you're... at your most vulnerable.

[j_tour]

That is the reason we invented flame-throwers.

Imagine one of them sitting above you when you're... at your most vulnerable.

Well, since you asked.

I must start eating better.  I've had exactly three movements of the lower bowel in the past ten days.

It is not good. 

I think the obstruction started when I had the brilliant idea to start drinking White Russians instead of my usual bourbon and beer.

I think I might be retarded or something. 

[outin]

I think I might be retarded or something.

Sometimes we do get a sudden moment of enlightenment!

But it is now suspected by scientists that our bowels have a great impact on our brain function...
My bowels have always worked well...in fact I need to go right now. And if I happen to meet a cute spider while at it, I will just have a little chat with him/her...little because it won't take me long to finish my business

[j_tour]

Sometimes we do get a sudden moment of enlightenment!

But it is now suspected by scientists that our bowels have a great impact on our brain function...
My bowels have always worked well...in fact I need to go right now. And if I happen to meet a cute spider while at it, I will just have a little chat with him/her...little because it won't take me long to finish my business

Well congratulations on your smooth moves.

We aren't all so lucky, papa! 

I'd welcome with open arms if I saw a spider crawling out of the throne if it meant I'd get a decent sh*t.

TBH, yes, I think the average secretions by the endocrine and renal and general digestion system in humans is about two or more liters quod diem.  It's a surprising amount, but humans are surprising creatures.

[outin]

Well congratulations on your smooth moves.

We aren't all so lucky, papa! 

I'd welcome with open arms if I saw a spider crawling out of the throne if it meant I'd get a decent sh*t.

TBH, yes, I think the average secretions by the endocrine and renal and general digestion system in humans is about two or more liters quod diem.  It's a surprising amount, but humans are surprising creatures.

Well, it's not all about luck. Ever heard of fibers?
When I look at what people eat these days I am not surprised they have time to meet MANY spiders during their sessions.

Back to music, did I mention I hate opera too? Singing is fun, I admit it, but I can barely name one classical singer I can bare to listen to...

[j_tour]

Well, it's not all about luck. Ever heard of fibers?
When I look at what people eat these days I am not surprised they have time to meet MANY spiders during their sessions.

Back to music, did I mention I hate opera too? Singing is fun, I admit it, but I can barely name one classical singer I can bare to listen to...

OMFG you're a regular philistine! 

Who doesn't study Wagner or Berg? 

I mean, it comes down to personal taste, I guess.  I don't spend my time listening to Richard Strauss, but, well, whatever I guess.

And, yes, I'm a pretty good cook and I know all about macronutrients, but I'm also a bachelor and extremely lazy.

[outin]

OMFG you're a regular philistine! 

Who doesn't study Wagner or Berg? 

I mean, it comes down to personal taste, I guess.  I don't spend my time listening to Richard Strauss, but, well, whatever I guess.

And, yes, I'm a pretty good cook and I know all about macronutrients, but I'm also a bachelor and extremely lazy.

I guess you are right. I simply do not care for people. They are at best ok and useful as some sort of entertainment or work force but at their worst annoying and a nuisance.

I live alone too, hate cooking and am incredibly lazy..but it only takes a few things:
- Avoid red meat (and why not, it does not even taste good)
- Avoid white flour...it just kills your bowel. Unfortunately this does mean most delicious bakery stuff should be limited from daily use...as well as pizza On the other hand white bread is tasteless compared to what we finns are used to eating

- Instead of white rice, pasta or whatever use whole grain. Once used to it the white ones seem like nothing to eat.
- Try to add some real vegetables to the food every now and then.
- Chili and good coffee never hurt, but coffee must be dark roasted if you are prone to heart burn

[j_tour]

 

[perfect_pitch]

And if I happen to meet a cute spider while at it, I will just have a little chat with him/her...

You do realise... spiders don't talk??? That's just the hashish you've been consuming that's making them appear to talk.

[outin]

You do realise... spiders don't talk??? That's just the hashish you've been consuming that's making them appear to talk.

Of course they do! They just don't want to speak to a wannabe rambo with an addiction to flame throwers...

[perfect_pitch]

I prefer to talk to humans instead of spiders...

You know... like normal people do.

[outin]

I prefer to talk to humans instead of spiders...

You know... like normal people do.

Normality is so overrated...as well as people...

[perfect_pitch]

Normality is so overrated...

Only by crazy people.

[outin]

Only by crazy people.

You just don't know what you are missing...

[perfect_pitch]

There is no 'Right' crazy... just varying degrees of bat-sh*t loony.

You might like this song Outin, enjoy.

[outin]

There is no 'Right' crazy... just varying degrees of bat-sh*t loony.

You might like this song Outin, enjoy.

It's a nice song, sure...and so last decade...

[perfect_pitch]

I'm sorry - let's find one that's from this decade...

There you go - nothing but grinding axe noises and techno-trash. Feel better???

[outin]

I'm sorry - let's find one that's from this decade...

There you go - nothing but grinding axe noises and techno-trash. Feel better???

Sorry, had to stop the video at the beginning...the noises from children were too much for me...

[j_tour]

It's a nice song, sure...and so last decade...

ZOMG.

I think you people are going to give me a coronary.

Yeah, I know my uncle hasn't left his apartment in a month or more, so kept some dispoable medical masks from work.

I tell him once, "Hose rules, just don't touch the toilet -- it's filthy and you're just going to spred your nasty gastric sh*t around my apartment.  At the very least wash your hands, you digusting animal"

Second or third time, his retoirt?  "Well, it's just habit."  Well, time for some ne habits.  This is my place, and I don't ask much:  don't break my equipment, and use the toilet like I said.  Or go outside, for all I carel

And what a surprise when I left the place to drop him off.  Hundreds of cigarette butts just strewn all over my carpet.

Yeah, I'm not Joe Clean, but at least I clean up after myself, especially at somebody else's place.

And some great effing piano player...."Mumble mumble, I just play in C."  Well effing try harder, nerd.  A.  Ab.  Db.

I won't say I hate all people, but pretty damned close. 

[perfect_pitch]

Outin... That's the idea... you get a coronary, I win the thread.

My evil plan is finally coming to fruition.