Last post wins!!!!!

[ivorycherry]

hola

I strongly advise to leave this forum and never come back for your own good.

Look what you’ve already gotten yourself into.

No.  I have a new test subject. 

You disordered twine may not have the precious youngling, for it is mine!

Don't worry, honey.  Daddy's here.  Those bad people are just trying to make you scared and such.

Bad things happen here.

Bad, bad things...

All right, fine.  Don't tell ogpersonday, but I have a pound and half of red meat in the fridge that is even too bacteria-laden for me to eat.  And I want to kill my downstairs neighbor's dog.  Not deliberately, but by creating an attractive nuisance.  OK, I guess that's deliberate.  I love the dog.  I'd rather kill t do anything untoward, because, like Jesus, my favorite author, I love my neighbor.

We all joke when we're frightened, right?  I love to hug my puppy at night.  And I don't have an imaginary kitty-cat which looks like a fuzzy sock/...

All right, fine.....I can take it in the face froim Mike Tys...

all right, that's enough playtime.

[j_tour]

I strongly advise to leave this forum and never come back for your own good.

Look what you’ve already gotten yourself into.

Bad things happen here.

Bad, bad things...

That's right.

You yankee pig dog!

Never sleep! 

[perfect_pitch]

I strongly advise to leave this forum and never come back for your own good.

Like you have a chance at surviving this as well ivorycherry.

Well J_Tour, this may be the shortest win ever; barely a full minute.

[j_tour]

Like you have a chance at surviving this as well ivorycherry.

Well J_Tour, this may be the shortest win ever; barely a full minute.

I don't think so.

[perfect_pitch]

Well J_Tour, this may be your shortest win ever; barely a full minute.

I don't think so.

I do! Actually, you're right. 6 seconds. That's a record. Now all I need to do is have patience and post whenever you're offline... as I know if I reply now, you're sitting there furiously hitting the refresh button waiting for me to reply so you can strike back.

I'm a patient man.

[j_tour]

I do!

You feelthy peeg!

[perfect_pitch]

Missed me.

[ranjit]

I do! Actually, you're right. 6 seconds. That's a record. Now all I need to do is have patience and post whenever you're offline... as I know if I reply now, you're sitting there furiously hitting the refresh button waiting for me to reply so you can strike back.

I'm a patient man.

Looks like you just typed 49 words in 6 seconds, at 490 wpm. Someone's got to better that.

[ranjit]

Not happening again once Nils takes away editing privileges.

[j_tour]

Not happening again once Nils takes away editing privileges.

Shut your goddamned mouth.

Ain't sh*t happening until I say so. 

pregnant cat.

[perfect_pitch]

I mean, 6 seconds J_Tour... that's EMBARRASING. I hold the title for the last post because I have a quote from the year 2,000,000,000 stating that I will win.

NO ONE can beat that timestamp. You've got to admit, it is genius. Not only that, but I hold the title of 'fastest reply' & 'quickest win', while you have the title of 'shortest win'.

I beat you at your 'first post wins', and I've beaten you in the 'last post wins' thread. I AM THE ALPHA AND THE MOTHER-*** OMEGA!!!

I have you beaten at every turn. You can TRY and best me, but deep down you know that I am craftier, sneakier, more intelligent and far better capable than you are.

Just admit defeat J_Tour and you'll feel better. You can lift that rock upon your shoulder and breathe easier... you can unburden yourself.

[j_tour]

Just admit defeat J_Tour and you'll feel better. You can lift that rock upon your shoulder and breathe easier... you can unburden yourself.

I will gut you from vent to sternum, like a rainbow trout.

Do not question my authority!

Submit!  Smell the glove!

[ivorycherry]

Like you have a chance at surviving this as well ivorycherry.

Oh, I can’t win this thread, and that’s for certain. I’ve given up long ago. Just warning lil Billy here from the dangers of this thread.

[j_tour]

I hold the title for the last post because I have a quote from the year 2,000,000,000 stating that I will win.

Sure thing, quickdraw.  Fast and loose.  Just like my women.

Just warning lil Billy here from the dangers of this thread.

Hanging around the showers at the YMCA is not a good idea.  Dangerous elements are lurking.

pregnant cat

pregnant dog

Exactly.

[perfect_pitch]

Do not question my authority!

Submit!  Smell the glove!

I'll question your authority if I DAMN WELL PLEASE!!!

And what glove is it you speak of that I'm supposed to smell. It's not laced with Chloroform, is it?

[j_tour]

And what glove is it you speak of that I'm supposed to smell. It's not laced with Chloroform, is it?

[perfect_pitch]

Submit!  Smell the glove!

Nah... I don't want to.

[j_tour]

Nah... I don't want to.

Oh, that's not a choice for you to make.

One way or another, that glove is going places.

Nick Nolte knows all about it. 

[perfect_pitch]

Oh, that's not a choice for you to make.

One way or another, that glove is going places.

That glove will never find itself located within inches of my nostril. You think you can force it within arms reach of me???

[j_tour]

You think you can force it within arms reach of me???

Yes. 

You're going to think it's a candy colored clown they call the sandman, tiptoeing to your room.

Drink the whole bottle first:  it's medicine.

[perfect_pitch]

Did your 3 year old kid draw that??? It's pretty good for a 3 year old.

[j_tour]

Did your 3 year old kid draw that??? It's pretty good for a 3 year old.

I was actually sterilized at birth by the communists, so that's pretty rude of you to say.

[perfect_pitch]

I was actually sterilized at birth by the communists, so that's pretty rude of you to say.

Maybe, but I'm sure it was for the good of all humanity.

(Sorry, I couldn't help myself, but when someone hands you an easy volley like that - you just have to serve it back)

[j_tour]

Maybe, but I'm sure it was for the good of all humanity.

(Sorry, I couldn't help myself, but when someone hands you an easy volley like that - you just have to serve it back)

Yeah, well, that's just like your opinion, man.

[perfect_pitch]

Well, when you serve it up like that on a platter... who can blame me for taking a bite.

[j_tour]

Well, when you serve it up like that on a platter... who can blame me for taking a bite.

[perfect_pitch]

You're not Batman...

[j_tour]

You're not Batman..

Exactly.  I whupped batman's ass.

Don't make me bring out the Wesley Willis, you damned fool.

[perfect_pitch]

HOLY CRAP... BATMAN. Christian Bale is *** ENGLISH???

I have NEVER heard him talk like that. I thought he was American. It's like hearing Demis Roussos sing... your ears can't believe what they're hearing...

...and it's freaking you the *** out.

[j_tour]

HOLY CRAP... BATMAN. Christian Bale is *** ENGLISH???

I have NEVER heard him talk like that. I thought he was American. It's like hearing Demis Roussos sing... your ears can't believe what they're hearing...

...and it's freaking you the *** out.

Yeah.  You should be watching out.  Sxrxbxjx, Bale, Lemmy. 

There are some limeys out there.

[perfect_pitch]

There are some limeys out there.

Sxrxbxjx

True... very true. That may be the nicest way of censorship I have ever seen. The use of x's for vowels... and most creative. I think it's fxcking wonderful. The shxt you can get up to is blxxdy liberating.

[j_tour]

True... very true. That may be the nicest way of censorship I have ever seen. The use of x's for vowels... and most creative. I think it's fxcking wonderful. The shxt you can get up to is blxxdy liberating.

No it isn't.

***, I have to make a goddamned video of the precipitato of Prok. 7.  ***.   sh*t. 

Yeah, I can do it, but it's a *** lot of effort!

Why don't you play it, mister man?

[perfect_pitch]

I'm not a fan of Prokofiev - too percussive. Right now, I'm still trying to get back into Rachmaninoff, but my bloody thumb is still healing.

I might have to take a little break from piano till the April school holidays...   

 

[j_tour]

I'm not a fan of Prokofiev - too percussive. Right now, I'm still trying to get back into Rachmaninoff, but my bloody thumb is still healing.

I might have to take a little break from piano till the April school holidays...   

 

Yeah, damned right that particular Prokofiev is percussive.

Yes, II'm just being a lazy turd about doing a video.

April isn't so long:  I barely touch the keyboard these days.  A little rest is good.

my bloody thumb is still healing.

Stop sitting on it, you fool!

[perfect_pitch]

April isn't so long:  I barely touch the keyboard these days.  A little rest is good.

Yeah, but after a while piano can be like drugs. When you don't get it often enough, you start coming down and jonesing.

[j_tour]

Yeah, but after a while piano can be like drugs. When you don't get it often enough, you start coming down and jonesing.

Yeah.  But at least it is by choice and circumstance, not like being imprisoned and forced to abstain.

I get my fix in by reading scores away from the piano.  It's not the same thing as playing at the keyboard, but it's not nothing, either. 

Besides, at home, my instruments are a good twenty or more imperial feet from my desk!  That's a lot of effort, man!

///////////////

All right, I'm curious, what did you do to your thumb?  If it's really gnarly looking, you should post a picture! 

[perfect_pitch]

All right, I'm curious, what did you do to your thumb?  If it's really gnarly looking, you should post a picture! 

Unfortunately, nothing gnarly about it. I just put my hand down on the ground to support my weight as I went to sit on the floor, and felt something crack.

It's not fractured or broken, but it's sore just at the base of the thumb, close to where the webbing is.

[j_tour]

Unfortunately, nothing gnarly about it. I just put my hand down on the ground to support my weight as I went to sit on the floor, and felt something crack.

It's not fractured or broken, but it's sore just at the base of the thumb, close to where the webbing is.

Well, can you make it a gnarled remnant of a finger?

I demand evidence of extreme suffering!

For it is the Lenten season!

[perfect_pitch]

Well, can you make it a gnarled remnant of a finger?

I demand evidence of extreme suffering!

For it is the Lenten season!

Hey - the point of Lent is that Jesus suffered, so that we don't have to. Although, considering it was his father that demanded that he spend the 40 days in the desert, he can't have been father of the year.

[j_tour]

Hey - the point of Lent is that Jesus suffered, so that we don't have to. Although, considering it was his father that demanded that he spend the 40 days in the desert, he can't have been father of the year.

Whatever.  No offense intended, but you know I don't believe in any of that.  Yes, I wear a cross around my neck, "pray" the rosary in the universal language from memory, and wear a medallion of Ignatius also around my neck and carry a medallion of Mary.

Here's my version of relief.



And, yes, I really do pray this medicine works.

True story.

Although, considering it was his father that demanded that he spend the 40 days in the desert, he can't have been father of the year.

Well, forty, maybe for that old hippie, but for us mortals the Lenten season is forty six days, as the calendar goes.

[perfect_pitch]

Well, forty, maybe for that old hippie, but for us mortals the Lenten season is forty six days, as the calendar goes.

Oh - who the hell is counting. I was going to give up procrastinating this year, but I couldn't be arsed with it.

[j_tour]

I was going to give up procrastinating this year, but I couldn't be arsed with it.

You really should.  Too much of it will make you go blind.

[perfect_pitch]

I was going to give up procrastinating this year, but I couldn't be arsed with it.

You really should.  Too much of it will make you go blind.

No... that's masturbation.

[j_tour]

No... that's masturbation.

You said a no-no.

Anyway, what is procrastination, really?

Yeah, I guess I have to touch my monkey.

But I'll do it tomorrow.

[perfect_pitch]

You said a no-no.

It is??? I don't remember my pre-school teachers telling me that.

It's better than all the vulgar, juvenile alternatives...

Wxnkxing, txxchxng the mxnkxy, slxppxng the sxxsxge.

[j_tour]

It is??? I don't remember my pre-school teachers telling me that.

It's better than all the vulgar, juvenile alternatives...

Wxnkxing, txxchxng the mxnkxy, slxppxng the sxxsxge.

You're almost on the edge of opening the box of monkeys, little man!

[perfect_pitch]

Well... life is full of people who 'dare to do', instead of shirk away at the chance.

[j_tour]

Well... life is full of people who 'dare to do', instead of shirk away at the chance.

All right, put down the oil can of Foster's.

[perfect_pitch]

Fosters??? Christ, that stuff tastes like piss.



I wouldn't drink it, even if it was free.

[j_tour]

Fosters??? Christ, that stuff tastes like piss.

That's a feature, not a bug.

Drinking urine is good for you.

Next you're going to say you hate all watersports.

Nonsense.